關(guān)于家長(zhǎng)不能對(duì)孩子說(shuō)的話
篇一:關(guān)于家長(zhǎng)不能對(duì)孩子說(shuō)的話
10 Things You Should Never Say to Your Kids
You probably wouldn?t use old-school phrases like “Wait until your father gets home” or “I wish you were more like your sister” with your kids. But there are lots of less obvious ones that you should avoid, for their sake and yours.
1. “Great Job.”
Research has shown that tossing out a generic phrase like “Good girl” or “Way to go” every time your child masters a skill makes her dependent on your affirmation rather than her own motivation, says Parents advisor Jenn Berman, Psy.D., author of The A to Z Guide to Raising Happy, Confident Kids. Save the kudos for when they?re truly warranted, and be as specific as you can. Instead of “Super game,” say, “That was a nice assist. I like how you looked for your teammate.”
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2. “Practice makes perfect.”
It?s true that the more time your child devotes, the sharper his skills will become. However, this adage can ramp up the pressure he feels to win or excel. “It sends the message that if you make mistakes, you didn?t train hard enough,” says Joel Fish, Ph.D., author of 101 Ways to Be a Terrific Sports Parent. “I?ve seen kids beat themselves up, wondering, ?What?s wrong with me? I practice, practice, practice, and I?m still not the best.?” Instead, encourage your child to work hard because he?ll improve and feel proud of his progress.
3. “You’re okay.”
When your child scrapes his knee and bursts into tears, your instinct may be to reassure him that he?s not badly hurt. But telling him he?s fine may only make him feel worse. “Your kid is crying because he?s not okay,” says Dr. Berman. Your job is to help him understand and deal with his emotions, not discount them. Try giving him a hug and acknowledging what he?s feeling by saying something like, “That was a scary fall.” Then ask whether he?d like a bandage or a kiss (or both).
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4. “Hurry up!”
Your child dawdles over her breakfast, insists on tying her own sneakers (even though she hasn?t quite mastered the technique yet), and is on pace to be late for school — again. But pushing her to get a move on creates additional stress, says Linda Acredolo, Ph.D., coauthor of Baby Minds. Soften your tone slightly by saying, “Let?s hurry,” which sends the message that the two of you are on the same team. You can also turn the act of getting ready into a game: “Why don?t we race to see who can get her pants on first?”
5. “I’m on a diet.”
Watching your weight? Keep it to yourself. If your child sees you stepping on the scale every day and hears you talk about being “fat,” she may develop an unhealthy body image, says Marc S. Jacobson, M.D., professor of pediatrics and epidemiology at Nassau University Medical Center, in East Meadow, New York. It?s better to say, “I?m eating healthy because I like the way it makes me feel.” Take the same tack with working out. “I need to exercise” can sound like a complaint, but “It?s beautiful outside — I?m going to take a walk” may inspire her to join you.
15 Ways to Get Your Kids to Eat Better
6. “We can’t afford that.”
It?s easy to use this default response when your child begs you for the latest toy. But doing so sends the message that you?re not in control of your finances, which can be scary for kids, says Jayne Pearl, the author of Kids and Money. Grade-schoolers may also call you on this claim if you turn around and make an expensive household purchase. Choose an alternative way to convey the same idea, such as, “We?re not going to buy that because we?re saving our money for more important things.” If she insists on discussing it further, you have a perfect window to start a conversation about how to budget and manage money.
7. “Don’t talk to strangers.”
This is a tough concept for a young child to grasp. Even if a person is
unfamiliar, she may not think of him as a stranger if he?s nice to her. Plus, kids may take this rule the wrong way and resist the help of police officers or
firefighters whom they don?t know, says Nancy McBride, executive director for the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children, Florida Regional Office, in Lake Park. Instead of warning her about strangers, bring up scenarios (“What would you do if a man you don?t know offers you candy and a ride
home?”), have her explain what she?d do, then guide her to the proper course of action. Since the vast majority of child-abduction cases involve someone a kid already knows, you might also adopt McBride?s favorite safety mantra: “If anyone makes you feel sad, scared, or confused, you need to tell me right away.”
8. “Be careful.”
Saying this while your child is balancing on the monkey bars at the playground actually makes it more likely that he?ll fall. “Your words distract him from what he?s doing, so he loses focus,” says Deborah Carlisle Solomon, author of Baby Knows Best. If you?re feeling anxious, move close to spot him in case he takes a tumble, being as still and quiet as you can.
9. “No dessert unless you finish your dinner.”
Using this expression increases a child?s perceived value of the treat and
diminishes his enjoyment of the meal itself — the opposite of what you want to accomplish, says Parents advisor David Ludwig, M.D., Ph.D., director of the New Balance Foundation Obesity Prevention Center at Boston Children?s Hospital and author of Ending the Food Fight. Tweak your message along these lines: “First we eat our meal and then we have dessert.” The wording change, though subtle, has a far more positive impact on your child.
10. “Let me help.”
When your child is struggling to build a block tower or finish a puzzle, it?s natural to want to give him a hand. Don?t. “If you jump in too soon, that can undermine your child?s independence because he?ll always be looking to others for answers,” says Myrna Shure, Ph.D., professor emeritus of psychology at Drexel University in Philadelphia and author ofRaising a
Thinking Child. Instead, ask guiding questions to help him solve the problem: “Do you think the big piece or the little one should go at the bottom? Why do you think that? Let?s give it a try.”
篇二:關(guān)于家長(zhǎng)不能對(duì)孩子說(shuō)的話
最好不要對(duì)孩子說(shuō)下面十句話:
1. 你為什么就不能夠象-----
孩子被對(duì)比,很可能增加他們本能的敵對(duì)情緒,甚至耿耿于懷.
應(yīng)該向孩子講清楚你的具體要求.重點(diǎn)放在你希望他改變的不良行為上.
2. 你怎么這么不懂事
被話刺傷的孩子只會(huì)心生叛逆,把事情弄得更糟.
要和顏悅色,耐心講理,才能達(dá)到預(yù)期的目的.
3. 你簡(jiǎn)直笨到家了
這話只能使他們的心靈受到極大傷害.有的因此產(chǎn)生自卑感,不求上進(jìn).
家長(zhǎng)正面積極的鼓勵(lì)和卓有成效的幫助,才是讓孩子養(yǎng)成良好習(xí)慣和掌握生活本領(lǐng)的根本方法.
4. 走開(kāi),能不能讓我安靜一會(huì)兒
會(huì)使他們覺(jué)得自己是多余的人,產(chǎn)生無(wú)以名狀的孤獨(dú)感.
倘若你的確想獨(dú)自呆一會(huì)兒,可以耐心向孩子解釋:我很樂(lè)意與你在一起,只不過(guò)現(xiàn)在太忙,請(qǐng)?jiān)?
5. 少羅嗦,閉嘴
孩子會(huì)認(rèn)為父母對(duì)我的意見(jiàn)一點(diǎn)也不重視.長(zhǎng)此下去,孩子會(huì)變得毫無(wú)主見(jiàn),依賴性極強(qiáng),把自己看 成一個(gè)無(wú)足輕重的人.
6. 老老實(shí)實(shí)去做,不然-----
空洞的威脅最終將損害家長(zhǎng)的威信.孩子反而會(huì)繼續(xù)自己的不良行為.瞧你怎么辦. 最好辦法是根據(jù)實(shí)際情況選擇具體的償罰手段.
7. 媽媽求你了
教育最怕出現(xiàn)獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)不管用,懲罰不能使.孩子軟硬不吃,但千萬(wàn)別說(shuō)媽媽求你了.說(shuō)這話就意味著父母繳械投降,孩子會(huì)從心里更加篾視你
8. 我沒(méi)本事
和孩子談話時(shí)把自己的自卑感表露無(wú)遺.絕大多數(shù)孩子的自卑感是由家長(zhǎng)誘發(fā)的. 父母如果能堅(jiān)定自信,樂(lè)觀向上,那么孩子對(duì)未來(lái)也是充滿信心的.
9. 揍死你
當(dāng)你說(shuō)這話時(shí),表明你再也拿不出什么好辦法了.這是一句根本無(wú)法兌現(xiàn)的大話.孩子并不會(huì)因此而停止他的活動(dòng).
10. 你滾吧,想去哪里去哪里
最后通牒式的話讓孩子沒(méi)法應(yīng)對(duì),他雖然不想離家出走,但更不想就此低頭.任性的孩子可能會(huì)逞一回英雄,真的離家出走了.
應(yīng)明確指出孩子的錯(cuò),即使在批評(píng)的時(shí)候,也應(yīng)讓他感到父母的慈愛(ài)和關(guān)切 . 你的孩子,你不管誰(shuí)管?
你的孩子,你不愛(ài)誰(shuí)愛(ài)?
請(qǐng)你別忘了每天把這份禮物送給孩子們:
1.讓孩子無(wú)拘無(wú)束
2.教孩子關(guān)心別人
3.發(fā)自內(nèi)心地大笑
4.表?yè)P(yáng)得有技巧,鼓勵(lì)孩子自信心
5.讓藝術(shù)走進(jìn)孩子心靈
6.微笑,讓孩子懂禮貌
7.適時(shí)地讓步
8.給孩子展現(xiàn)自己的機(jī)會(huì)
9.教孩子鑒賞他擁有的東西
10.讓孩子掌握新的技能
11.教他控制自己的行為
12.教孩子懂得為自己的行為負(fù)責(zé)任
篇三:關(guān)于家長(zhǎng)不能對(duì)孩子說(shuō)的話
引導(dǎo)語(yǔ):“你怎么能懶成這樣!”、“你怎么能這樣跟我講話!”這些聽(tīng)上去耳熟能詳?shù)脑,是不是?jīng)常聽(tīng)到父母講,下面這12句話里,透露著最簡(jiǎn)單的育人之道。
1、“快起來(lái)!今天上課要好好聽(tīng)講!”不要和孩子在早上談話,尤其是當(dāng)他還沒(méi)睡醒時(shí)。青少年喜歡在晚上交流,因?yàn)樗麄兊纳镧姳瘸扇撕笱印?/p>
2、“看著我的眼睛!辈灰币暫⒆拥难劬。用“并肩坐著”取代“面對(duì)面”,孩子比較容易打開(kāi)心扉。
3、“今天下午不許去打球了,我們需要談?wù)劇!辈灰加谜麎K的娛樂(lè)時(shí)間和他們談心,不妨在與孩子一起打球、看戲或者吃飯時(shí)交流一下。
4、“你摔誰(shuí)呢!”不要禁止孩子咆哮、摔門(mén)、哭泣。讓他們發(fā)泄,訓(xùn)練自己傾聽(tīng)他們帶有情緒性的字眼。
5、“你今天在學(xué)校怎么樣?”不要提過(guò)于籠統(tǒng)的問(wèn)題,而應(yīng)以正面的態(tài)度問(wèn)特定、具體的問(wèn)題。比如:“老師怎么評(píng)價(jià)你這篇作文?”
6、“你這么想完全錯(cuò)誤,應(yīng)該??”不要打斷他們的話,就開(kāi)始說(shuō)自己的想法。因?yàn)楹⒆有枰獣r(shí)間去整理思緒,通常不會(huì)一次就能表達(dá)清楚自己的想法。
7、“別總是亂花錢(qián)!”不要老把話題集中在瑣事上。談些更能引起他們興趣的話題,如體育比賽、音樂(lè)會(huì)甚至政治等,有助于彼此了解。
8、“下次理發(fā)時(shí),鬢角剪得短點(diǎn)!辈灰偸墙o他不需要的建議,而應(yīng)經(jīng)常贊
許他們的想法。
9、“你會(huì)干什么?我像你這么大時(shí)早工作了!”不要拿孩子與自己當(dāng)年進(jìn)行比較。時(shí)間長(zhǎng)了,孩子會(huì)拒絕與你溝通。
10、“你還不減肥,胖得腦子里只剩油了吧?”千萬(wàn)不要用困擾他的事情開(kāi)玩笑。記住,青少年敏感、容易受傷害。
11、“你為什么總干傻事?”不要在他們某些行為后,問(wèn)這樣的話。你可以問(wèn):“做這件事對(duì)你來(lái)說(shuō)有什么意義嗎?”
12、“不是我嘮叨,是你沒(méi)明白!”不要對(duì)某些事情一而再地嘮叨。只給他們提出自己的建議,相信孩子,讓他們自己去選擇。
篇四:關(guān)于家長(zhǎng)不能對(duì)孩子說(shuō)的話
我們常常聽(tīng)到的一句話“言傳不如身教”,如果我們能以這樣美好的方式跟孩子講話,而不是像火山熔漿一樣噴涌而出,孩子就會(huì)學(xué)會(huì)用美好的語(yǔ)言與人交流,以積極的態(tài)度對(duì)待生活。
每位父母都會(huì)有類似的經(jīng)歷,就是當(dāng)你正忙著做飯、洗碗或趕一項(xiàng)重要的工作時(shí),孩子不停的來(lái)打擾你。不是沒(méi)完沒(méi)了的問(wèn)題,就是成千上萬(wàn)的要求,或制造一個(gè)又一個(gè)麻煩,如飲料灑到地毯上、沾滿巧克力的小手摸過(guò)沙發(fā)又摸衣服、端盆水幫你洗沙發(fā)等等,最后導(dǎo)致父母崩潰、發(fā)怒??“再鬧我可打了!”“夠了!出去,別再煩我!”“你怎么這么討厭,我真后悔要了你這樣一個(gè)孩子!”結(jié)果是孩子被嚇哭了、或瞪圓了眼睛呆呆得看著你,那受傷害的表情、神態(tài)使你馬上后悔莫及。
當(dāng)然這些話肯定不是來(lái)自父母的心底,成年人也會(huì)說(shuō)錯(cuò)話,加上生活、工作的壓力,難免情緒失控對(duì)孩子發(fā)火。但這可能讓孩子的自尊心受到傷害,也會(huì)讓孩子感到憤怒或困惑,甚至影響到孩子的性格與成長(zhǎng)。讓我們來(lái)讀一讀最常見(jiàn)的語(yǔ)言失誤,看看哪些話父母不該對(duì)孩子說(shuō)。
1、“別煩我!”
照顧年幼的孩子是一個(gè)艱巨的工作,那些得不到休息的父母渴望能有片刻獨(dú)處的時(shí)間給自己充充電。但是,如果你經(jīng)常告訴孩子“別煩我!我很忙!被蛘摺皠e打擾我!”會(huì)讓孩子認(rèn)為跟你交談沒(méi)有必要,因?yàn)槟憧偸窃诖虬l(fā)他們。
如果孩子在幼小時(shí)就建立了這樣的模式,那么當(dāng)他們長(zhǎng)大時(shí)就不太可能告訴你發(fā)生的事情。在那些繁忙的時(shí)間,也許可以這樣說(shuō):“媽媽不得不完成這件事情,你需要安靜的畫(huà)幾分鐘畫(huà),我做完事情后,我們就一起出去!弊鳛楦改敢蛟撉宄闹,嬰兒和學(xué)前兒童不可能自己獨(dú)自玩一個(gè)小時(shí)。
2、“你怎么會(huì)這樣笨手笨腳?”
父母切忌對(duì)孩子說(shuō):“你怎么會(huì)這樣笨手笨腳?”有時(shí)孩子會(huì)無(wú)意中聽(tīng)到我們與其他人的交談。幼小的孩子相信他們所聽(tīng)到的一切。所以負(fù)面的言論會(huì)成為一個(gè)自我實(shí)現(xiàn)的預(yù)言。孩子會(huì)從大人的話語(yǔ)中得到信息,如“吝嗇是他的天性!薄氨渴直磕_”的莎拉開(kāi)始以為自己就是這樣的,這會(huì)損害她的自信心。即使話語(yǔ)看起來(lái)是中性或者積極的,如“害羞”或者“聰明”,也會(huì)給孩子帶來(lái)不必要或者不適當(dāng)?shù)钠谕TS多父母都還記得當(dāng)他們的父母說(shuō):“你真讓人絕望,你真懶,或者愚蠢!睍r(shí)的感受。一個(gè)更好的辦法就是就事論事,不要把孩子的個(gè)性混淆其中。
3、“不要哭!別像小孩一樣”
“不要哭!別像小孩一樣。”或者“現(xiàn)在我們沒(méi)有理由害怕。”但是孩子確實(shí)因?yàn)殡y過(guò)而哭泣,尤其是幼兒,他們還不能用語(yǔ)言來(lái)表達(dá)感情,他們確實(shí)傷心,確實(shí)害怕!跋胱尯⒆訑[脫這樣的感受應(yīng)該是自然的!眲诘麓鸂柋ぶZ瓦東南大學(xué)
西格爾早期幼兒研究所的黛比?格拉擇博士表示:“‘不要’或‘不必’這樣的話并不能讓孩子感到更好,這會(huì)讓孩子體會(huì)到,他們這樣難過(guò)和害怕是不對(duì)的! 承認(rèn)孩子的感情而不是否定,“當(dāng)杰森說(shuō)他不再是你的朋友時(shí),肯定會(huì)使你很難過(guò)。”“沒(méi)錯(cuò),如果你不習(xí)慣的話,海浪肯定會(huì)使你感到驚慌,但是我們一起站在這里,海浪會(huì)在我們的腳上拍打,我保證不松開(kāi)你的手!闭f(shuō)出孩子的確切感受,孩子就會(huì)用這樣的詞語(yǔ)來(lái)表達(dá)自己,你也在告訴孩子如何同情別人。最終他會(huì)停止哭泣并開(kāi)始描述和自己的感情。
4、 “你為什么不能像你妹妹?”
這樣的話似乎有助于把兄弟姐妹或者朋友樹(shù)立為一個(gè)光輝的榜樣。你也許會(huì)說(shuō):“看山姆拉外套拉鏈多好!被蛘摺罢淠纫呀(jīng)開(kāi)始用便盆,你為什么不能?”但是往往事與愿違。你的孩子不是山姆,也不是珍娜,而是他自己。
專家說(shuō),家長(zhǎng)對(duì)孩子們進(jìn)行比較是很自然的,從而對(duì)他們的行為和進(jìn)程有個(gè)參照。但是別讓孩子聽(tīng)到這樣的話。每個(gè)孩子都有自己的`前進(jìn)步伐,自己的氣質(zhì)和個(gè)性。比較并不會(huì)幫助改變現(xiàn)狀。在他們還未有任何準(zhǔn)備時(shí),被迫做不喜歡的事情會(huì)使幼小的孩子很迷惑,并且損害自信。她也可能會(huì)怨恨你,并賭氣不配合做你想要的。相反,鼓勵(lì)她現(xiàn)在的成績(jī),“你現(xiàn)在自己把雙手放在外套上。”“謝謝告訴我你的尿布需要換了。”
5、“如果你再這樣,我會(huì)揍你!”
通常父母沮喪的結(jié)果是威脅,但是很少有效。我們氣急敗壞地發(fā)出警告,“做這個(gè)或者其它的!”或者“如果你再這樣,我會(huì)揍你!”問(wèn)題是遲早你不得不兌現(xiàn)威脅,否則就是失去力量。而威脅或體罰孩子對(duì)改變行為是一種無(wú)效的方式。
孩子越小,吸取教訓(xùn)需要的時(shí)間越長(zhǎng)。研究表明,兩歲孩子在當(dāng)天重復(fù)劣跡的可能性是80%,無(wú)論你使用什么樣的紀(jì)律。新罕布什爾州大學(xué)的家庭研究實(shí)驗(yàn)室社會(huì)學(xué)家默里.施特勞斯博士表示。開(kāi)發(fā)建設(shè)性戰(zhàn)術(shù)會(huì)比依賴于威脅和體罰更有效,比如,叫孩子從那件事中走出來(lái),冷靜一段時(shí)間等等。
6、“等爸爸回來(lái)再說(shuō)”
“等爸爸回來(lái)再說(shuō)”這種父母間的熟悉推諉不僅僅是另一種威脅,也沖淡了對(duì)孩子的約束。有效的辦法就是,你需要立即采取行動(dòng)。延遲紀(jì)律與孩子行為結(jié)果并沒(méi)聯(lián)系。當(dāng)爸爸回家時(shí),你的孩子很可能忘記她做錯(cuò)什么事情了。另外,等待懲罰的痛苦也許比最初應(yīng)該得到的會(huì)更糟糕。把責(zé)任推給別人也會(huì)損害你的威信!叭绻徊扇〈胧,我為什么要聽(tīng)從她呢?”你的孩子會(huì)質(zhì)問(wèn)。不只這樣,你把你的伴侶放在了不恰當(dāng)?shù)摹t臉’角色上。
7、“快點(diǎn)!你怎么這樣磨蹭?”
在這個(gè)忙碌的連軸轉(zhuǎn)的世界里,比如連續(xù)不斷的預(yù)約,超額預(yù)定的時(shí)間表,睡眠赤字,交通堵塞,誰(shuí)沒(méi)有說(shuō)過(guò)這樣的話?當(dāng)然,每一位家長(zhǎng)在孩子找不著鞋子和書(shū)包,你要考慮要求孩子快一點(diǎn)時(shí)說(shuō)話的語(yǔ)氣,以及你催促孩子的次數(shù)。如果你每天開(kāi)始抱怨,尖叫或嘆息,這時(shí)要注意了。當(dāng)我們急著做什么而催促孩子,他們會(huì)由于使我們倉(cāng)促行事感到內(nèi)疚。這種內(nèi)疚讓孩子感覺(jué)不好,而且也不能促使他們行動(dòng)快一些。
“每天早晨我家里都忙成一團(tuán),我很討厭最后看到孩子生氣的樣子!薄度绾闻c孩子說(shuō)話》的作者及家庭治療師保羅?科爾曼說(shuō),“所以我和自己做了一個(gè)協(xié)議,不管是什么,即便有人撒了一地麥片,或者要我找什么東西,我都不會(huì)大聲喊叫
或瞪眼睛!辈灰謬,而是以一種冷靜的方式來(lái)快速處理事情,比如說(shuō),“我五分鐘前就告訴你關(guān)電視。”他馬上就把電視關(guān)掉了。
8、“做得太好了!”
“做得好!”或“你真棒!”這種贊美可能會(huì)有什么錯(cuò)誤嗎?別忘了,積極強(qiáng)化是父母最有效的工具之一。問(wèn)題是含糊不清和不分青紅皂白的表?yè)P(yáng)就不妥了。孩子做的每一件小事,比如從喝完牛奶到畫(huà)一幅畫(huà),你都隨口說(shuō):“做的太好了!”,這樣的表?yè)P(yáng)就變得毫無(wú)意義。孩子能感覺(jué)出來(lái),他們能區(qū)別做一項(xiàng)簡(jiǎn)單而機(jī)械的事情受到的表?yè)P(yáng),和確實(shí)付出努力受到的表?yè)P(yáng)。
想走出嘮叨不休的習(xí)慣嗎?這里有一些辦法:
1、對(duì)真正付出努力的成就進(jìn)行表?yè)P(yáng)。喝一杯牛奶或畫(huà)一幅畫(huà)就要表?yè)P(yáng),那么他們每天會(huì)畫(huà)很多畫(huà),喝很多次牛奶呢?
2、針對(duì)具體事情來(lái)表?yè)P(yáng)。不是籠統(tǒng)的說(shuō)“做的太好了!”而是具體地說(shuō):“你畫(huà)狗的花紋選用的顏色很明亮很歡快!被蛘摺拔铱吹侥銥槲覀兘裉熳x的故事畫(huà)了一幅畫(huà)。”
3、更多贊美孩子的行為!拔以谡砦募䲡r(shí),你玩拼圖是如此的認(rèn)真投入,和我告訴你的一樣!
我們常常聽(tīng)到的一句話“言傳不如身教”,如果我們能以這樣美好的方式跟孩子講話,而不是像火山熔漿一樣噴涌而出,孩子就會(huì)學(xué)會(huì)用美好的語(yǔ)言與人交流,以積極的態(tài)度對(duì)待生活。
篇五:關(guān)于家長(zhǎng)不能對(duì)孩子說(shuō)的話
父母絕不能對(duì)孩子說(shuō)的話 父母在最大程度上按照孩子的期待滿足他的愿望,是孩子走向自立的基礎(chǔ)。因此,我要忠告那些一邊工作一邊育兒的媽媽,千萬(wàn)別對(duì)孩子說(shuō):“媽媽白天工作已經(jīng)很累了,所以不要再對(duì)媽媽提出要求,自己忍耐一下吧!边@樣的話絕對(duì)不能說(shuō),可現(xiàn)實(shí)中很多人不知不覺(jué)就脫口而出了。大人必須要努力克制自己,盡量不說(shuō)這樣的話。作為一個(gè)父親,我工作回家之后,從來(lái)沒(méi)有對(duì)孩子說(shuō)過(guò)一次“爸爸工作很累,你們自己去玩吧”這種話。孩子們長(zhǎng)大一點(diǎn)之后,自然而然就能了解父母的辛苦。就算孩子們總是纏在身邊,父母也不要責(zé)怪他們,因?yàn)楹⒆又辉诙虝旱挠啄陼r(shí)光才會(huì)這么做。盡量不要對(duì)孩子說(shuō)“爸爸今天累了”,“已經(jīng)太晚了,不行”,“不可以”這種話。有一段時(shí)間,每次我一回到家,孩子就會(huì)搖搖晃晃地走到門(mén)口,想讓我抱著他去外面玩。這種情況持續(xù)了很長(zhǎng)時(shí)間。但是當(dāng)孩子明白無(wú)論何時(shí)只要他想,父母都會(huì)帶他去外面,他就會(huì)覺(jué)得晚上出去沒(méi)什么意思。父母帶著他逛一會(huì)兒,他就能意識(shí)到四周黑漆漆的,晚上外面并不好玩。當(dāng)自己的愿望實(shí)現(xiàn)時(shí),孩子會(huì)覺(jué)得滿足。所以,父母要盡早滿足年幼孩子的要求,這樣,孩子的欲望就不會(huì)進(jìn)一步升級(jí),而會(huì)邁向自立。
回家時(shí)是不是很累,這是父母的事,并不是孩子的期望。孩子不會(huì)希望自己出生在父母工作到很累才回家的家庭。父母可以選擇生不生孩子,但是孩子無(wú)法選擇自己的父母。比起父母是不是富翁,是否住著豪宅,更重要的是父母是否具有為人父母的心理。父母的愛(ài)心對(duì)于孩子來(lái)說(shuō)才是巨大的財(cái)富。
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